Somewhere along the journey from childhood to retirement the solution

So Americans are fat. At least that’s the running monologue playing out in more media outlets than we can completely ignore. But somewhere along the journey from childhood to retirement the solution to that problem has become the New Year’s Resolution that almost everyone makes and almost everyone hates: exercise more.

As children, playing outside was the reward, not the punishment … so much so that a ridiculous trend in too many elementary schools today is for children to be deprived of outside play time in a stationary timeout at recess as punishment (because we all know that the one-thing that helps discipline a hyperactive child to be calm is enforced stillness. Or not.)

Yet, trudging through the institutional world of education, exercise became the thing that the quintessential, sadistic gym teacher enforced, complete with tests, metrics and goals for the unattainable. The joy of movement dimmed as the realization that perfection was just not on the menu for most of us. And there was math to prove it. Charts, indexes, measurements, graphs – all calculated to show the weary where they fall short.

Exercise stopped being many people’s entertainment, when it stopped being fun.

I can’t be the only person who finds modern-day conversations about exercise about as compelling as a marketing report, full of deliverables and metrics. Or like a performance evaluation by a cranky boss who won’t notice the 10 things you did right,  but only the one thing you did wrong.

I already live in a world of deadlines and demands. Whether at home or at work, I must comply with so many requirements that I cannot bear to take up an activity that has a to- do list.

In fact, a working paper from the National Bureau of Economic Research reported that even when people were paid to go to the gym, most were not motivated to do it. Money could not camouflage the reality that many have lost that loving feeling for organized pain. And when the sales pitch is “no pain, no gain,” how surprising is it that many people just say no?